http://i.imgur.com/B0gax0e.jpg
I need to take a break from playing amazing EA games to talk about the crown jewel in its chalice of badassery, the Battlefield series. Battlefield is the best franchise of all time and EA is the best company in the industry to bring us this series of games. We totally need to all slam a Pepsi™ as the ensuing bro-dom sugar rush as I take us back to look at this franchise.

You’d better put on them headphones, because I am going to RAWK you EAStyle™!

The first Battlefield game was 2002’s Battlefield 1942. This game was solely unique in that it offered all us dude-bros a way to live our shared dreams of fighting in World War 2. No game to that point brought us gamers the ability to run and gun in the setting of WW2 and was seen by many as a essential evolution of the genre.

Battlefield 1942: Road to Rome dialed things up considerably by launching on less platforms, contained less guns and less maps. EA was really taking things to the next level and I laud them for the design and approach they took to this game.

EA consulted with Zeus and Thor to bring us the next installment Battlefield 1942: Secret Weapons of WWII. Some people thought this game was too expensive and brought little to the table. History will judge this game as a liberation of features and an expanse of cost!

Battlefield Vietnam changed the Battlefield landscape by doing something radical. They changed the locations you fought in! This gaming advancement was felt throughout the universe and in one offshoot timeline, blew up the planet Vulcan before Nero. Utilizing such powerful technology as 3D and Music, Battlefield Vietnam plunged us into deep combat never before seen in a shooter to date. Plus it added new skins to guns that previously didn’t use them.

After so many home runs EA decided to progress the Battlefield franchise by gifting the world with Battlefield 2. Providing more value by shipping on only one platform, EA realized to meet the demand of a modern audience they needed to up the ante by allowing people the ability to shoot guns from our modern time. Battlefield 2 also incorporated many more polygons in each model allowing all players the ability to buy faster computers.

Battlefield 2: Special Forces tore the video game industry to pieces when it shipped in 2005. I can’t write enough about how absolutely epic-tastic this game truly is. I used to own Shakespeare but after I played this game I destroyed my copies of this work because it makes King Lear look like horse shit. The writing alone propels this game to the largest heights of human creativity.

Battlefield 2: Modern Combat was awarded the Nobel Peace prize for its attempt to solve the conflict in the Middle East as seen through its epic narrative. After its release, Battlefield 2 went on to start a charity organization to help Earthquake victims in third world countries. Plus it added a new feature to the franchise, shooting people with guns who are on the other side of a battle.

Battlefield 2: Euro Force saw the series take a sharp turn in that it was an economic policy simulator. In Euro Force you took control of the Eurozone Bank as you attempt to sway all the remaining countries in Europe to adopt the Euro. Utilizing such tactics as more modern fiscal arguments, trade imbalance regulations and shooting people in the face, Euro Force was a really interesting take on the franchise. Largely considered one of the most influential treatises of modern Economic policy, Euro Force was a radical departure from the Battlefield forumla.

Battlefield 2: Armored Fury won IGF’s Best Video Game Award in 2006. Some people only viewed this release as only adding a few maps and vehicles to Battlefield 2. Whereas that might be factually true, what I find more interesting is what this game didn’t ship with. In Jazz, less is more and in keeping with that spirit, Armored Fury is one of the biggest expansions to the Battlefield series to date.

Battlefield 2142 answered the question that Battlefield fans had been wondering for years. “What would happen if they added 200 to 1942?” The Battlefield franchise had innovated so much by bringing us the combat of the past as well as modern combat to fans so the next logical step was to tackle the future. Unlike Battlefield games of the past, 2142 saw players shooting at each other with guns on land, flying planes shooting guns and driving things to shoot guns. Innovating even further these guns required ammunition and reloading, a huge leap in advancement to come in the upcoming 200 years of human combat.

Battlefield 2142: Northern Strike took the series focus to Europe, an area previously left untouched by the Battlefield franchise. EA, daring to never return to the success of its past really floored the gaming industry by showcasing future combat in Europe.

Battlefield: Bad Company took the franchise in an entirely new direction and focused on a human dinner protocol simulator. Bad Company allowed you to play the host of a dinner where you had to outline the flow and pacing of the unfolding event. EA offered players a challenging set of guests all related to the theme of “Bad Company.” One set of guests as seen in the Protagonists parents saw the conversation turn to uncomfortable territory such as “you will never amount to anything” and “why don’t we have grandkids yet?” Other Bad Company missions saw the protagonist navigating such awkward situations as serving steak for your very vocal vegan friends, accidentally mentioning politics around strong political activists and people that eat like pigs.

For many years Battlefield players complained that they could only pay for a game once. EA heard this complaint and attempted to sway fans with Battlefield Heroes. Battlefield Heroes solves the painful problem of not being able to give video game companies enough money by incorporating a Microtransaction model and a Free to Play atmosphere. No longer burdened by the shackles of paying for things once, Battlefield Heroes is one of the most beloved games in the franchise.

Battlefield 1943. If I have to spend time talking about how epic this game was, then Hitler will be magically resurrected as a Unicorn hell bent on destroying Eurasia.

Battlefield: Bad Company 2 built on the human dining protocol simulation that the original Bad Company built and took it to the next level. Adding amazing features such as more guests and dialog options, Bad Company 2 really pushed the genre forward. The game is also noteworthy because it also featured vocal work by Dom Deluise.

Battlefield: Bad Company 2 Vietnam really showcased EA’s subtle attention to detail. As the development team enhanced the dining protocol simulation’s core rendering pipline a new outer meshing 3D polygon count block wave vertical flux particle enhancement was made to its spatial transformation protocol rendering. This radical transformation allowed the games artists to simulate clothing at a level unseen by most modern games. Polyester and cotton never looked so real and as such EA won a IGF technical excellence in artistry award for making clothing look “Even more realer than the real looking shit in the last game.”

The Battlefield franchise had made so much progress to advance video games as art that EA decided to take an entirely new direction. Hiring young children and partially illiterate marketers EA employed its short lived “lets start naming games like children and illiterate marketers” initiative. Battlefield Play4Free was the result of that initiative and as such the game became an instant hit with the very young and incompetent.

Battlefield 3 was largely considered by all gamers to be EA’s shining work in multi-player innovation and creativity. Long time video gamers had been complaining for years that online multi-player was way too free and as such implemented an online pass for its console versions. Since most players also despise purchasing used games this allowed EA the ability to give players the ability to purchase a new online code when they made the mistake of buying a used copy of Battlefield 3. “We are unleashing our most valued customers from the tyranny of the used games market. This public service in our online pass we sell to enable multi-player is our way of hugging our customers into doing the right thing.”

Battlefield 3: Back to Karkand might have technically been DLC that just recycled old Battlefield maps and just added some new gun and vehicle reskins but thats only scratches the surface. The development team was experimenting with a new feature that would, according to some leaked memos “Allow the customer to question why they would spend $15 on this stupid bullshit and instead do something creative.” The feature was very controversial as it enabled free thinking and was later stricken in favor of the shipped feature that impressed upon users “Oh whatever, i'll just buy this as its only $15 and I wasn’t doing anything anyway.”

Battlefield 3: Close Quarters saw the inclusion of EA’s new Crosshair 4,000 technology. Never before had players experienced pointing guns at people with as much visual detail and clarity.

Battlefield 3: Armored Kill was the first Battlefield game to feature in game players with armor that you had to kill. Also allowing the player to ride in armored tanks and planes, this advancement of the genre actually informed the United States military in its most recent combat operations.

Battlefield 4 is the next installment in the mind bendingly diverse Battlefield series. Boasting such features as next gen console support, Battlefield 4 will be the set the new standard for video game excellence. Pushing the envelope, EA now supports the HD graphics of the Playstation 4 and PC. “Shooting the other team has never looked better” reported IGN in a recent hands on with the Battlefield 4 Alpha. Battlefield 4 will push the genre forward by allowing online multiplayer, matchmaking and the ability to switch between a few guns. I am really looking forward to this game as it will be a modern masterpiece!

This was posted April 1st, 2013

BR   Supporter wrote on 04/01/2013 at 07:12pm

Don't you just love EA? Such great people :)

vdogmr25 wrote on 04/01/2013 at 08:10pm

This post gave me cancer. All the cancer.

jdodson   Admin   Post Author wrote on 04/01/2013 at 08:33pm

But Brah, why don't you like Battlefield? Its so Epic!

Chris_Schetter wrote on 04/02/2013 at 04:22pm

This post should feel free to die in a fire.

jdodson   Admin   Post Author wrote on 04/02/2013 at 04:55pm

It was very tedious to create, at the end I skipped two Battlefield games. I was like "fuck the rest, I want to end this." :D

vdogmr25 wrote on 04/02/2013 at 06:58pm

I enjoyed BF2 quite a bit and 2142 was alright, but the "bro" gamers kinda killed it for me.

BR   Supporter wrote on 04/02/2013 at 07:19pm

In all honesty I enjoy BF3, I just can't play it very well cause my computer sucks.

Its not a great game but it is fun to play every once and awhile.

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